01.25.08
Posted in Love, Relationships at 1:03 pm by belovedheart
We’ve always liked lists. Shopping lists. Honor lists. Wish lists. Lists of goals and dreams. Our favorite is the common to-do list. We live by it. Maybe you do too. And if so, you know the wonderful feeling of checking an item off your list. With a simple check mark we know we’ve accomplished something we set out to do. We’ve made progress. That little check tells us we’ve taken another step big or small in the direction we want to go.Short and to the point. That’s the value of a good list. And that’s the primary value of our new book, too. We cut straight to what you can do starting today to make your marriage better. How do we do this? By giving you the ultimate to-do list for couples. It’s a proven list for pin-pointing specific behaviors, actions and eventual habits that are sure to keep your love life running at its peak performance.
Research has shown that people who make a tangible list and keep it handy are far more likely to achieve their goals than others who have the very same desires. That’s why we came up with The Love List. As a husband and wife who write for, speak to, and counsel with countless couples each year, we wanted to know, in very practical terms, exactly what we, as “the experts,” should be doing to make our marriage the best it could be. The little to-dos we’ve put in this book have become our answer. And after years of studying couples that live and love to the fullest we believe this roll-up-your-sleeves-and-get-practical approach is for every couple wanting the most from their marriage.
Here’s how The Love List works. It consists of eight small actions practiced daily, weekly, monthly and yearly:
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Once a day |
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Take Time to Touch (If Only for a Minute) |
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Find Something That Makes You Both Laugh |
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Once a week |
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Do Something Active That Lifts Your Spirits |
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Boost Your Partner’s Self-Esteem |
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Once a Month |
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Rid Yourselves of Harmful Residue |
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Fire Up Passion in the Bedroom |
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Once a Year |
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Review Your Top-Ten Highlights |
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Chart Your Course for the Coming Year |
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A few small actions can change everything for a couple. Little deliberate behaviors quietly lavish love on a marriage. And know this. The items on The Love List are within reach of every couple who is willing to try. They are not extravagant. They are not for the romantically gifted. They won’t cost you more money. And they aren’t going to require inordinate amounts of time. The List, short and to the point, is not for perfect people. It’s for busy couples who sometimes bicker, get stressed out, have communication meltdowns, struggle with money, are not always sure how to discipline their kids, and all the rest. In other words, The List is for real life. Plus, it’s fun. It focuses on proactive behavior you can do and you will see results almost immediately.
We did. When we made laughter a daily habit, for example, we quickly learned that it is impossible to stay mad at someone who makes you laugh.
Source: The Love List
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Posted in Christian Dating at 12:59 pm by belovedheart
Tim and Janice have been dating for almost a year now and the relationship couldn’t have been a better blessing from God, in having each other. Both Tim and Janice have experienced failed relationships with non-Christians and want this relationship to be right. The love that they have for God has been so attractive to one another. They pray together, they also witness together and share so much in common. It was a month before they even kissed. It is like no other relationship they had ever experienced before because both of them have God first and foremost. However as they got to know one another, kissing led to hugging, then hugging was followed by being sexually aroused until eventually they ended up falling into bed and committing fornication. Now all of the things that drew them together are now jeopardized by their insecurities, lack of trust and fleshly desires for one another.
This story happens ever day where people go too far and fail to let God grow the relationship in His time. Dr. Suzan D. Johnson Cook’s states it best in her book,
A New Dating Attitude, “Dating is both getting to know a person with a view that the person might be the spouse God intended for you, and letting yourself be revealed enough so that that person can be confident that God has intended you for him.”Intimacy while dating is a very tempting situation. It’s like playing chess with the evil one. While most people in today’s society would quickly say that kissing is harmless, if we are honest with ourselves, we know that kissing leads to other things that tempt us into sexual immorality. I turn you to Ephesians 6:12, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”
It is only human nature to feel sexually attracted to another person that we connect with on some level. However, becoming that intimate with someone not only grieves the Lord, but it also creates soul ties or oneness with the other person. While sparks may fly and you feel all tingling inside, what was once a divine connection you experienced, you also stand to lose so much because you still have a lot to learn from one another, but now you’ve allowed Satan to enter the camp.
As Christians we must understand, that God’s plan is to bless us by giving us the desires of our heart. However blessings do not come through disobedience to his word and the evil one knows this, that’s why he tries so hard to trip us up. When Tim and Janice started their relationship it was all to the glory of God and they were doing good works in the Kingdom by sharing His word with others. That’s what God desires from us. It’s also important to remember what Paul wrote in Romans 7:21, “So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me”. Somewhere along the way, if we are not mindful, the flesh takes control. The evil one’s sole mission is to conquer and divide believers. These two people who love God and are looking to unite for the purpose of furthering the work in His kingdom are targets for the evil one. Although God is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins, Tim and Janice must work backwards to set boundaries and keep His commandments.
With Christian dating, here are some tips to refrain from taking intimacy too far:
- Discuss and maintain boundaries founded on God’s word;
- Avoid spending time alone in intimate settings during the dating process;
- Make sure that God remains the number one focus by praying and sharing scriptures daily with each other and with others;
- When you find that your curiosity is getting the best of you, remember that you can curse your blessing and destroy something that could be absolutely beautiful with God as the head of your lives; and
- With God, ALL things are possible!
Source: Growthrac Articles
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